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Saturday, September 22, 2012

Our Celebration and first 32 hours!!!

Yesterday, I was so excited on my way down to Chucks to officially live with him that I called him on the phone and asked us to pour us each 1 sip of wine in a wine glass. He asked if I was sure I wanted wine that early in the day, since it was only 12:30 p.m. but I was insistent because this was such a special moment and I didn't want to forget it. I was actually feeling quite elated in the car and couldn't wait till I arrived. Walking through the door, I reminded myself that this was the first time I was really "coming home" even though I had walked in that door many times before. Chuck was there to give me a big hug, and said, 'Welcome Home." I hugged him, hard and didn't want to let go. I was right where I had wanted to be for many years...finally in his arms in the house I shared with him. Tears came to my eyes as I held him tightly with my arms around his neck. We then had a toast with a few sips of wine. each of us made one about our finally being able to live together in the same home now that my children were all old enough to be on their own. With another hug or 2 behind us, we got into the car and headed off to the Big E in Springfield, Ma. to spend a day together at one of our favorite events. We held hands most of the day, although that is nothing unusual for us. I found myself often just leaning over and giving him a kiss on the cheek. At one point after I had done that, I said, " I am very happy today." He told me he could tell. I asked him how, and he said it was because I kept kissing him! Ah, he knows me so well. The rest of our time together has been very restful and relaxing. Today we both worked on our computers and took a nap. We then went and worked out, sat on the back deck a bit, and had dinner at Panera Bread with a gift card we had received. It's still a bit hard for me to believe that this is real and that the time in our lives where we only had every other weekend together is behind us. I am so happy and truly believe that although there may be a few bumps for us in our future, we will face it together and be happy just to be with each other. It's been such a long time coming, and I am so grateful that our time has finally arrived!

Friday, September 21, 2012

Today is Move In Day!!!

Today is the day I have been waiting for for a very long time. Today is the day I move in with my husband, lover, and best friend. It has been a very long wait...6 years since we were engaged and started planning our life together. I am actually a bit in shock that the day has finally arrived. Chuck has the patience of Job though. He has been there, living alone, and waiting for me to join him in his home for all this time. We have had many bumps along the way, mostly in the form of my 3 children, who were 11, 11, and 14 when he first met them. We tried to work it out so we could all live together earlier. But due to personality conflicts, it just wouldn't work out. When we got married 2 years ago, we made the decision that I would stay in my home, and he would live alone in his, until my 2 youngest, twin girls, turned 18 and went off to college. Yesterday, they turned 18!!! And I also dropped one of them off at college in Philadelphia, PA. The other one starts her class in large animal veterinary assisting at the local community college today, and her dad is helping her move into her own apartment tomorrow. With my oldest out on his own already, that means starting today, I can turn my full attention to Chuck, the man of my dreams, and my best friend. I can finally be a full time wife to him. It feels like a miracle to me that this day, that I have been counting down to for years, has finally arrived. I am so grateful for this opportunity. And feel so blessed to be married to Chuck.For awhile I was concerned about how the two of us will do, living together when we both have certain ways of doing things, and routines that we are used to. I guess that is true of any couple who get married and move into the same household together. But usually by the time you head into a second marriage, the couple is older and more set in their ways. I love this man so much, I don't want to do anything that will upset his life, or cause him aggravation. But today, all those fears have gone. I know there will be an adjustment period, but I also know we will deal with issues as they come up, and get through them. Today is the first day that we will live together as hu8sband and wife, and I am beside myself with joy!!!

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Only 2 More Days Till Move In Day!

I can't believe it...the day after tomorrow I will FINALLY be moving into Chuck's home and living with my husband. It has been such a long wait. Although we have been married just over 2 years, we officially started dating way back in 2005, and got engaged in 2006, so it has been a very long wait to be together. The time seemed to drag on and back 3 or 4 years ago, it seemed like this day would never come. After we got married in 2010, it somehow made the time drag even more slowly until we could be together because as husband and wife we grew closer emotionally, but still had the physical distance between us. Once the countdown was down to about 4 months, it seemed to start coming more quickly. And here we are today, Wednesday, September 19th and we are only 2 days away! Tomorrow I am bringing my daughter to college at Drexel university in Pennsylvania, and the following day, I am moving in FINALLY with the love of my life. There are still some lose ends to tie up on my end with the house that I currently own. I had a big moving sale over the weekend and got rid of a lot of things including a kitchen table and chairs, household items, kitchen utensils, picture frames, extra Christmas decorations, kids clothing and stuffed animals they have long outgrown, etc. My home, that I shared with my children is looking very bare as my daughter has claimed some of the furniture for her own new apartment and it systematically disappears from this house to hers. I am still in the process of weeding through items and deciding whether or not to donate them, save for one more yard sale, keep them or throw them away. This will take time. But as the time has gone on, I have sensed and emotional shift within myself. I have gone from being sad and nostalgic about leaving the home where I raised my children and have such fond memories, to being ready to move on to this next chapter in my life with Chuck. I have realized that my children are moving on, and that's how it should be, so it's time for me to as well. And I plan to wholeheartedly embrace my new life with the best husband in the world for me! You can be sure I will keep you updated...

Thursday, September 6, 2012

15 Days and Counting!!!

Oh my gosh, as each day goes by I am getting more and more excited about being with Chuck full time. But the process of going through 25 years of "stuff" that has accumulated in my house is grueling. 5 people lived here at one time. That means "stuff" x 5 is still here. I am filtering through most of my things now, and plan to have a full day with the kids and my ex to throw out all the things that are junk, and sift through everything to find the keepers that they will take with them. It is bitter sweet for me. This house is filled with memories. I have found hundreds of pictures of the kids when they were little...playing in the snow in this yard, with neighborhood kids, their birthday parties here at the house, first day of school, etc. And many pieces of artwork from kindergarten on. I am a sentimental fool and don't know what to save and what to throw out. This is much harder than I thought. Through this whole process though, I have to keep reminding myself of the next step for Chuck and I, and how wonderful that will be to be able to spend our lives together and live with each other daily instead of weekend visits. That part is exciting and is carrying me through the process of sifting through the past so I can move on happily, and less encumbered by "stuff" to our future!